Gadget cat.

There is a popular cartoon here imported from Japan called "Doraemon: Gadget Cat from the Future."

It is probably the worst cartoon ever. It's just over-expressive (you can tell by the mouths that take up half the face in the above photo) people interacting with a cat that is gigantic and doesn't do anything impressive. 

It isn't funny or clever.

Did I mention it's from the 70s? I mean, live action TV back then was awful (Batman). Just imagine cartoons, and international cartoons. 

Ugh, and of course it is dubbed, but since these people are so expressive and whiny and annoying, half the dubs are just sound effects of heavy breathing or "ahhh!" or "ayy!" when people are falling over.

It just wastes a half hour time slot of TV while we could all be watching something else. However, Lucas and Lucia love it.

Cristina and Pichon hate it. As did Rocio. Clearly parents hate it all over.

One thing is for sure: Doraemon will NOT be on my list of  "things I will miss when I go back home."

Pulled pork and Budweiser.

As I mentioned in my previous post, I have photos from American night. I didn't go overboard this time, and only took several. 

Click on any picture to blow it up full screen.

I just love this picture because Lucia is at the end of the table wearing a leotard, looking super serious as Maria and Dani listen intently to whatever she is saying. "...And that is how the Union won the American Civil War."

This photo (and Lucia's facial expression) make it a lot more believable when I tell you that Lucia wore the skirt UNDER the leotard instead of on top. And she wore it allllll night.

You can see the chips and guac and cocktail meatballs in the foreground.

Left to right: Maria, Monica, Lucas, Lucia, Maria, Dani, Marina, Mayte.

Cristina and Mari Carmen. Here you can see the punch bowl!

Mashed potatoes, baked mac and cheese, punch, green beans, Caesar salad, iced tea, pulled pork, hot dogs...it's like HOME!

That's Laura peeking in on the left, and Mari Carmen's husband holding up his pulled pork and Budweiser. Pichon and Jose Enrique are standing up.

Marina, Miguel (Mayte's BF), Maria, Josep (Maria's BF), Lucia, Dani, Maria, myself

Oven baked smores. Mmmmmmm....

I know, there weren't a lot of close ups of food. I figured faces were more important.

"I always thought the white stuff was cheese!"

So here was my menu for American night, and a rundown of the reactions to the various foods.


Appetizers
Chili Dip
Cocktail meatballs
Guacamole

Drinks
Punch
Arnold Palmer

Sides
Mashed potatoes & gravy
Green beans
Baked beans

Main Courses
Chicago-Style hot dogs
Meatloaf & gravy
Pulled pork sandwiches
Baked mac and cheese
Chicken pot pie turnovers

Desserts
Smores
Ice Cream pie with Oreo crust
Chocolate chip cookies
Brownies
Peanut Butter balls

I know it sounds like a lot. There were 14 people including myself, and I wanted to make some food I know they probably haven´t had before, so I got a random sampling of stuff that I thought was very "American," and therefore went a little overboard. Yes, there were leftovers.

Let´s start at the beginning. I felt very much like my dad on Thanksgiving, with food already in the oven before people came over, and a list planned out for the "schedule of events" aka "when to put stuff in the oven and take it out." I also felt very much like my dad, shooing people out of the kitchen while trying to be a friendly host at the same time.

Fallas Video!!!

Just a few random moments/memories I wanted to share about Las Fallas:

Almost everyone in the group lost their voices, starting on day one. The second morning of Fallas, Marina, Cristina(not my host mom, but her friend), Maria and Josep slept over at the apartment we stayed at (it was an extra empty apartment owned by Cristina's parents). When I woke up, Marina was on the mattress across the room in her sleeping bag. She whispered loudly in a gruff voice (like I said, she lost her voice), "MELISSA. MELISSA. DO YOU HAVE A KLEENEX?" Maria was laughing because I didn't hear her, and Marina said "Guys, will you please help me over here?" referring to how they needed to gang up and shout to me because Marina couldn't do it alone. Then, about 15 minutes later (we were all still laying down), she said "I'm really hot." Cristina told her to take off her sleeping bag, and Marina replied, "I can't. I am not wearing any pants."

One of the nights over dinner, the conversation turned to the USA and cultural differences. Laura and her husband got married last fall and took their honeymoon on a road trip to the southwestern US. She was telling me about things she encountered, such as:

• "They had ice machines in hotels! They have these little tubs with lids in your room, specifically for ice! You go to the machine (there is one on every floor), and you fill it up with ice to keep in your room! We had one of our hotel rooms near one of those machines, but we didn't know how noisy it would be in the middle of the night! It was a learning experience!"
• "They like ice...almost every restaurant gave you ice in your water. I always had to ask for an extra cup because I like my water room temperature, so I always took out the ice."
• "What are those bags called for extra food from restaurants? Doggy bags? I love that phrase!"

Everyone at the table was as amused as she was by these American wonders. I asked her what the weirdest thing she ate was, and she said Beef Tartar. I have heard of it, but I didn't know what it is. She told me there was raw meat in it, so that is probably why I've never had it.

Then the conversation drifted to my American experience aka: my life, and more specifically, high school. Some of the questions asked:

• "Did you have cheerleaders at your school!?"
• "Did you have Prom? Who'd you go with? Did you get one of those wrist flower things? (corsage) Did they have PUNCH to drink at the prom?! Did people really pour alcohol in the punch bowl!?"
• "Did you have LOCKERS!?"
• "Do people really get rejection letters from universities when they apply? Is it really that big of a deal?"

They were so amused by these things and the responses. Everything they were referring to, of course, was something they had seen in a movie. So some were accurate, and some were not (like spiking the punch...since our school just had pop cans). 

One of the nights was costume night, and Marina left right after dinner to meet with a friend, then came back for the dance part (after dinner, the casal turned into a private night club--fallas people only!). So she had to take off her costume, which she was wearing over street clothes. However, she decided to "change" right next to the table, so one of her friends made a comment that she was doing a strip tease (again, she was fully clothed underneath) next to us. In response, Marina took off her costume's belt and started swinging it around her head in this jokingly-sexy way, and almost hit three people at the table behind her. It was hilarious.

That night, during costume night, all of the men at one of the tables dressed up as the Village People. Then, later during dance time, the DJ played "YMCA" and "In The Navy." I thought it was great that people gestured the wrong letters during the YMCA, just waving their hands in a general upwards direction if they weren't sure (the letters are obviously said in English, which many don't know). 

Mayte had a fairly new boyfriend, who wasn't in the casal, so she was constantly calling him on her cell, then sneaking off to chat for an hour. One of those times, she came back downstairs where we were eating after being gone for nearly an hour, and our whole table (my host family's friends) start singing the Spanish equivalent of "K-I-S-S-I-N-G. First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes Mayte with the baby carriage..." She was a little embarrassed. 

Anyways, the moment you've all been waiting for: The video for Las Fallas.



Some explanations of on-screen stuff...
0:00-0:31 La Mascleta--The noisy firecracker show they did every day at 2pm March 1st until the end of Las Fallas. Marina, Maria Carmen, Maria, Lucia and Pichon are all there with me.
0:31-0:37 Fallas monuments and lights throughout the
0:38-0:43 Nachete (Maria's nephew), Lucas, and Dani running around the casal when they were bored.
0:43-0:45 Dani, Maria and Lucia staring at our giant falla monument.
0:46-0:56 The DaVinci fall monument. It was huge.
0:57-1:02 Hospital-themed falla (the large falla of the casal that Marina made her falla for)
1:02-1:19 Various fallas monuments from throughout the city, including the AWESOME lights for the France-themed falla.
1:20-1:33 Photos. See my other post for descriptions.
1:34-1:41 Pasacalles with our casal faller.
1:42-1:48 Marina's carousel falla monument that she designed, painted and constructed. You can see the awards it won, also (3rd place in special section, 2nd place for cleverness and humor).
1:49-1:50 More pasacalles of our casal faller, this time in the morning.
1:51-2:00 Lucia, Lucas and Maria throwing firecrackers and poppers.
2:01-2:17 Various fallas monuments
2:18-2:21 Pichon made paella one night, and that's Jose Enrique trying it out.
2:22-2:27 A casal faller heading to the ofrenda in the morning, view from our apartment's balcony. Notice the bobbing dresses dancing to the music...
2:28-2:51 Laura, Maria Carmen, Mayte, Marina, Jose Enrique and Pichon, everyone dancing. Jose Enrique and Pichon reenacted the dance scene from Dirty Dancing when the DJ played "I've Had the Time of My Life." To be honest, they knew more about the dance than I did (I only remembered the jump-into-his-arms part)
2:51-2:58 Some other costumes in the casal on costume night. Yes, that is a man dressed as Snow White.
2:59-3:00 You can see some of the "Village People" dancing in the background...
3:01-3:02 Every night, before dinner, the fallera mayor descended down the stairs as everyone stood up and applauded. Then we all took our seats when she took hers.
3:03-3:14 The kids' costume night: Sherlock Holmes, cute kitty cats, Dani as a fireman, Maria as Minnie Mouse, and Nachete as a pirate. It was really cutely organized: The kids got to the stairs, were asked their name and costume on the microphone, then they walked down the "runway" to the front, where they got a pair of spring-loaded googly eye glasses.
3:15-3:17 Marina getting her prize with the little falleras from the casal that she designed her falla monument for. They go up on a stage in the town square, pose for a picture, and pic up a flag/banner to carry around town in pride.
3:18-3:19 Dani with Lucas's and his school mascots, Peca y Lino. Lucas had them over the weekend to take pictures of to put in Peca and Lino's journal, like the traveling gnome.
3:20-3:25 More pasacalles with our casal faller. Like our very own marching band that followed us.
3:26-3:33 Monday night there was a random Christians and Moors parade.
3:33-3:37 The giant virgin Mary statue, whose dress is made of flowers from the Ofrenda. It is huge, as you can see.
3:38-3:42 More of our pasacalle
3:42-3:49 Skirt fluffing, bandana tying, dancing, flower grabbing, veil arranging...all steps for the big Ofrenda! Marina is the one getting her veil arranged by Cristina's mom. To be honest, her dress was my favorite of the whole group.
3:50-4:02 The Ofrenda.
4:03-4:39 Monica lighting the wick (for the kids to go off and light firecrackers), Lucia's school's falla monument, kids from the casal setting off fire fountains, fireworks from the falla monument burning, our fallera prepping to set our falla monument on fire, Dani looking on in his fireman's costume, our mini falla monument burning all the way to the ground, as the music from our marching band plays on.

The falla from Lucia's school took three minutes to burn. The kids made it, and it was mostly paper and cardboard. The professional falla infantil from our casal took over 15 minutes to burn (it was the same size). The latter was made with styrofoam and wood.

Yes, it smelled bad.
Yes, I probably took 3 years off my life from being in attendance.
Yes, ash flew into my hair.

Yes, it was amazing to watch.

Fallas Photos!

Remember when I said I'd post Fallas pictures? Well, that time has come, finally. 

As with my previous photo post, please click the photos to enlarge them. I made them super small to load faster. 

First, we start a few days before Las Fallas weekend, when Lucas and Lucia each had their own fallas monuments at school. Lucas' school didn't burn them (the kids are too little) but they did put them out on display. Lucas' class's theme was spiders. Each kid made a spider in class, and if they wanted to, they could make one at home. His is the giant one on top (the one he made at home) with the purple Play-Dough eyes...

The other classes' monuments.

You'll notice from now on a lot of these artist-looking shirts. These are typical fallas shirts, and basically what I wore all weekend long (the kids did, too, along with all of Cristina's friends). They have a few buttons on top, then just flow down. Obviously you need to wear a shirt underneath. Sometimes people wear it with a handkerchief around the neck.

Dani and Lucas, playing with the little cars after school in the play area.

Lucia's class's falla monument. The theme was a garden. You may remember she goes to an English school, hence the obvious signage.

Lucia, after the falla burned. It kind of looks like it's her fault.

Our falla monument was just a block away from the casal. On Thursday night we "moved in" to the apartment in the city to be close to all of the activities downtown and with the casal. That is the best night to go out and see the other falla monuments throughout the city, since there are very few tourists. We went out from 1am-4am to check out the monuments. And surprisingly, there were many people doing the same (although not nearly as many as I would imagine on Fri or Sat night).

Some of the makeup setups from the falla. Gothic, warpaint and cubist paintings/makeup.

The main "doll."

See more photos after the page break!

Lorax: En búsqueda de la Trúfula Perdida

During my long Easter weekend, the host family and I had the chance to go to see The Lorax, or as it is known here, Lorax: En búsqueda de la Trúfula Perdida. If you aren't sure what this is, it's an animated movie about the Dr. Seuss book (which is a story about wastefulness and nature and caring about the environment, in an easy-to-swallow, chewable kids vitamin format).

 Much like my time going to the Spanish soccer game, this was my first time ever going to a Spanish movie theater. Why hasn't it happened before this weekend? For two reasons: One, I don't go to movies very much in the US either (the most recent movie I saw in theaters, prior to this, was Tron: 3D in January 2011, and before that...I can't even remember). Two, I really dislike Spanish dubbing (no subtitles here!) because the voices are annoying and it's hard to follow an actor when their lips mouth English and a dub speaks Spanish. Movie trailers are hard to follow because I don't know if I am listening to a voice dub of an onscreen actor or a trailer narration. But in Spain, it's a huge industry for dubbing, so every show/movie imported here is dubbed. Period.

"Taylor Swift, Zac Efron, Betty White: all voices you WON'T hear in this movie!"

So here are some observations I made during my very first Spanish movie theater experience...

 1. The theatre was huge; it felt like I was in an airport. You could even buy tickets at the window or at a machine, like when you check in for a flight. The analogies are endless with the airport situation. More on that later... This is an actual photo from the website of the Kinepolis theater in Valencia.

 2. There were opening previews for movies like Ice Age: 4 (yes, really), Despicable Me: 2, and commercials for Kinepolis itself. Kinepolis is the name of the theater/entertainment complex that contains the theater. This complex includes bowling, various restaurants, a huge play area (with giant buttons that play cartoon SFX), arcade, etc. Now let me tell you about the announcement itself: It was not appropriate for children. The beginning was like "Kinepolis is not only great for a Sunday morning..." followed by shots of happy parents and kids playing at the arcade, seeing movies, eating lunch, bowling, etc, "but it's great for a Sunday afternoon." followed by a shot of the two exhausted children sleeping on a couch, while sounds of mattress springs and the parents' screams of ecstasy play in the background. Yes, this ad infers "take your kids to Kinepolis in the AM, wear them out, then while they take their afternoon nap, you parents can get busy in the bedroom without interruption." Interesting for a theater whose audience was about 90% children under the age of ten. Then again, on mid-day TV, Coming to America was on, and the bathing scene at the beginning featured topless servant women giving Eddie Murphy a bath. Not topless women with blurs. Just topless women. Being naked.

 3. I was confused at times, having this be my second language and all. That's a given. However, being Dr. Seuss, there were a lot of made-up words. For me, they just sound like Spanish. I asked Cristina what a "trufula" was, and she didn´t know and said she thought it was probably made up. Then I realized it is the equivalent of asking her what a "thneed," a "Once-ler" or a "lorax" was. They are not real things, in case you couldn't figure it out. I also had no idea, the entire duration of the movie, what "A no ser" meant, etched on what looked like a gravestone.

Oh.

 4. The arm rests at this theater were DOUBLE WIDTH! Two arms fit on one armrest. The US needs to get on that, asap.

 5. We had assigned seats. Maybe it was because we bought the tickets early, to ensure seats. But the theatre was like, less than 10% full for our movie, which I thought made it funnier that the host family was checking each ticket "are you seat 16 or 18? 18? Okay, I go here and Lucia goes in 17." I was thinking to myself "you do realize we have THE ENTIRE ROW to ourselves, right? And the row in front of us? And the row in front of that? And the next row? There are about 6 empty rows between us and the other fifteen people in this theatre." I wonder if they were like "THAT´S NOT YOUR ASSIGNED SEAT!" when I got up and moved a few rows down because Lucia was literally jumping in her seat halfway through the movie (Lucia gonna be Lucia) and therefore being quite distracting.

 6.My host family was also very against the idea of bringing snacks with you. "THEY DON´T ALLOW OUTSIDE SNACKS." Really? No one ever checked. It´s not like we were at an airport. Or maybe they thought we were because of the design. But having Pichón be a Lays Chip distributor, we happened to have a giant box of chips, cheese doodles and what-have-you in the kitchen that day that made me wanna stash some for the movie. "NO OUTSIDE SNACKS!" my host family said. I thought "Wow, for a country of people who park wherever they please (yellow striped areas, medians, the entire lane closest to the parallel parking that is a DRIVING lane), smoke weed in public (my dad and I smelled the wofting odor of marijuana in some plaza in Barcelona), and burn giant foam and wood sculptures ten feet away from inhabited buildings, they sure are afraid of what might happen if you bring outside snacks to a movie theatre. The movie theatres seem to have induced more fear over outside snacks than the law enforcement over enforcing actual laws. For all I know, bringing in outside snacks could induce the worst punishment of all. Now I am thinking what that could possibly be, but really, I think a parking ticket would make me more fearful.

 7. No Taylor Swift. No Zac Efron. No Taylor Swift and Zac Efron song over closing credits. I just found out there was no Zac Efron and Taylor Swift duet. But how am I supposed to know when it is all DUBBED!? If I haven't mentioned it before, Spain has a huge business for dubbing, and there are actors hired to be voices of specific English-speaking actors. There is a "George Clooney voice" and "Julia Roberts voice" and "Hugh Jackman voice." There is a person for that voice, so when you hear it in a commercial, you can be like "Hey that's (fake) George Clooney talking to me!"

"Starring: SOMEONE ELSE as TAYLOR SWIFT as AUDREY!" 

No Danny Devito as The Lorax. OH WAIT, yes he was. Yes, that's right, Danny Devito voiced himself in Spanish. And apparently also Latin-American Spanish, Italian, German, and Russian. My host mom said she recognized the voice as being foreign, but she said it was hard to figure out where he was from. I heard the Danny Devito trivia fact after seeing the movie, so I didn´t fully enjoy his accent during the movie. Oh well. The producers of the film were glad he wanted to do the foreign voices because other actors can´t portray the role like the chosen actor does. TELL ME ABOUT IT. All of the breathy, ditzy-sounding voices used for every female American actress on TV here is quite grating. It´s like the Spanish equivalent of Marilyn Monroe is voicing every character from House's Olivia Wilde to Gossip Girl's Leighton Meester to Gilmore Girls' Alexis Bledel. Although, I was really happy about the voice they used for Taylor Swift´s movie character. For once it didn't sound like a sex-kitten voice. Or the voice of an adult imitating a child´s voice (which happens in basically any adult-oriented show that features children. So, any show except ones that would normally air in the US on Cartoon Network, Disney Channel or Nickelodeon). It was just a run-of-the-mill, normal girl's voice.

Grillin' in the park

This past Saturday was the "Valentine's Day" dance for the kids at their Falla. The theme was 50s dress up, like the movie Grease. They also had an American-style lunch/snack, with cheeseburgers and shoestring potato chips. There were extras on the table and I was practically drooling I wanted one so badly. But I resisted.

Here is a group photo of all the kids in the falla. Lucia, Dani, Maria and Lucas are front and center.

The kids didn't have very "50s"-ish clothes, but we tried our best to dress them up.

Then, on Sunday, in the plaza near Pichon's parent's house, there was some kind of festival where we brought a grill and made a fire on the ground and cooked food. There were a bunch of other people around making little fires and grilling sausages and snacks. It was more of an "almuerzo" since it was around 10am that we were nibbling on chorizo and fried tomato bocadillos.

There were a bunch of little tents selling stuff, like the previous weekend with the paella. Of course, being a plaza in Spain, there was a giant clocktower that would chime a LOT. The kids were especially mesmerized.

Staring at the clock...

Maria and Lucia also enjoyed sticking their hands in these giant head masks (yes, people plop those on their heads...and see through the mouths). I took a picture, and Lucia made a silly face.

It was fun. And my coat didn't reek as much as it did from the paella festival, where it smelled like I sat inside of a barbecue overnight or something.

Why? Why must you rub this in my face?

A couple weekends ago, we were going to eat lunch at Foster's Hollywood.

Foster's Hollywood is a chain restaurant in Spain with American style food. Burgers. Ribs. Fries.

Burgers here are apparently so uncommon (I didn't think they were that rare, but here you go) that my coworkers were talking about how crazy it is that they ask you so many questions about your burger at Fosters. "How do you want it cooked? Rare? Medium Rare?" "Lettuce Tomato and Onion?" "Cheese?" etc. I was like "What do they ask you at the other burger places?" And they were like "What other burger places? McDonalds?"

I was really really really excited about going there for lunch. All day, I was thinking "Should I order a big juicy burger? Or smoked ribs? Or other items with BBQ sauce? Or other forms of red meat?"

Then Pichon and his dad were chopping firewood for a really long time, leading to us leaving the house later, and therefore arriving during prime lunch rush. There were long lines and Cristina decided we'd eat at McDonalds.

It wasn't too bad. I got a McWrap, which is a breaded chicken breast in a tortilla with lettuce and tomato.

Side note: They have a McJamon, which is like a big mac with Spanish jamon on it. It makes me laugh.

And for dessert, there was a fancy little McCafe, and I had a macaroon and a lemon cupcake. Fancy!

I swear, I have eaten more McDonalds in the past two months here than I have in the past 5 YEARS in the US. Which isn't a lot. Three isn't a lot.



One day, I have hopes that we will return to Fosters and I will get that meal.


As for now, these targeted ads on my web browser taunt me. They know I want that Fosters. And they are gonna wave it in my face.

I am surprised it took Gin so long to discover this.

Yesterday I went into the kitchen around 9:30am to grab breakfast.

Lucas was up, playing with Play-dough on the kitchen table. The rest of the family was upstairs getting ready for the day.

I walk into the kitchen and see the floor soaked with water, and I wonder who spilled and/or why someone would leave the floor like that.

Then I see the plastic fish tank on its side, the source of all the water. 

Then I see Gin.

And then I see Gin's paw, batting at the non-flopping goldfish on the wet floor.

I scream "GINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN" then grab the fish with one hand and toss it in the plastic tank held by the other, then rush to the faucet and start filling it with water. I set it on the table and stare at it, hoping this will be like when Mario in SuperMario64 rushes up to the surface from snorkeling and regains all his power. 

Don't let that pie chart get to the red zone!

As this worry occupies the back of my mind, I run over to Gin, who is wondering where his snack is, and smack him on the side as I yell "MUY MAL!!!!!!"

Pichon rushes in, and he is like "What is going on/who spilled?" I explain what happened and this launches Pichon into a vengeful fury against Gin. He slaps Gin and Gin runs out of the room and Pichon chases him downstairs into the laundry room where the cat sleeps and slams the door, locking Gin inside.

As you may know, Pichon hates this cat.

Lucas, in the mean time, is pushing Play-dough through the dough extractor, making Play-dough spaghetti. "What happened?" I explain what happened.

Now Pichon is furiously mopping up the water mess (not a lot, about a half gallon or liter of water, but pretty much everywhere, since it fell from the counter onto the floor, about a 3.5 foot drop) and he tells me to not worry about it and just get my breakfast. 

I sit next to Lucas, who is now punching out dog bone-shaped pieces of Play-dough. "But what happened with Gin?" I am like "Lucas, I just told you."

Now the counter is all wet and we realize the plastic fish tank is cracked and slowly leaking out water. Pichon puts the fish in a wine decanter, claiming Gin can't tip it over nor reach inside.

This does seem pretty cat-proof, actually.

The fish is not floating on the top, but he sure isn't swimming around happily at this point. I mean, he just had a earthquake in the only 5x5x5inch world he has ever known as home. He then was deprived of his natural environment, water, while being smacked by a paw of a furry creature approximately 100 times his size.

That is TRAUMATIZING.

By this time, Cristina is in the kitchen asking what happened, and we explain and she shrugs it off, saying "It's a cat. That's a fish. Cats are genetically prone to attack/want fish." Meanwhile, Pichon is adding this to his long list of reasons why he hates having Gin around (other things on this list include "he smells," "he scratches our leather couch," "he jumps on the dinner table while we eat," etc).

I told Cristina how great it is that Gin just got his claws removed, because he was only merely batting at the fish where if this happened a week ago, he would've stabbed a claw right through the fish's eye and probably eaten him.

This morning I found Gin near where the fish tank used to be, but the new decanter-tank wasn't there.

Now the new tank is back where the old tank used to be, and Cristina found him with his head in the top, as far as it could go, watching the fish.

High quality artist's rendering.

The fish is now happily swimming in his new home. They do say fish have horrible memories. I can only imagine this fish having faint traumatic dreams of what happened to him yesterday. 

I also want to know how long it will be before Gin becomes the decanter-vase version of this cat:

Weekend in Munera and the debut of Lucas the horsewhisperer

Last weekend we went to Munera (Pichon's family's pueblo, or village).

It's located in the Autonomous Community of Castilla de la Mancha, which is famously known for Don Quixote.
Don Quixote is a novel about a man who thinks he is a knight but really he's just a little crazy. It's a famous literary work and therefore there were symbols of Don Quixote everywhere we went...

(Click to enlarge)

Here I am with Lucas and Lucia, next to a statue of Don Quixote and Sancho Panza, in front of the famous windmill (that Don Quixote famously tries to fight thinking they are giants). 

Here, I tell you all about the weekend, including some footage of our adventure...

Did that really just happen?

Last week, Pichón told us this happened:

Lucas: Qué es esto? Pica! (What is this? It stings!)

 Lucas was holding a bottle of hand sanitizer that he had opened and taken a sip of.

Get ready for the Reyes!

Tomorrow is Reyes Magos, or Three Kings Day. We have the day off of work, and it's a day of presents!

Like I've said before, this is the big day for the kids, and officially the final big holiday of the season. You can tell because rebajas (sales) starts the next day, and it is insanity in the stores around town.

This is kind of like our Santa Claus tradition with leaving presents under the tree. The reyes are the guys who the kids tell what they want for presents, who they visit in the mall, and who in the end come during the night to drop off gifts.

Tonight the kids were as anxious as an American child on Christmas Eve...both wanting to go to sleep and not being able to do so due to the anticipation of the nighttime visitors.

Lucia burst into my room before bedtime to tell me that I needed to put a shoe (yes a shoe) under the tree so the reyes will leave me something. I left one of my brand new suede boatshoes, because I think they leave candy and I didn't want to eat food out of a dirty gym shoe. At least, I hope they leave candy. Actually...I think I hear the "reyes" putting candy under the tree right now...

And Cristina used the whole reyes thing to her advantage, getting the kids to pick up their toys downstairs by the tree. "You better pick up your toy trucks so that the reyes won't trip on them! If they do, they might not bother to come next year because this is the house in which they broke their ankles!"

Tonight we ate dinner with Monica and her kids while Jose Enrique went to the Valencia soccer game with friends for his birthday (and also just because they like going to the soccer games). Monica forgot to give Cristina a shoe each from Maria and Dani to put under the tree so that the presents will come for them (so maybe there isn't candy to fill the shoes, and this is just an indicator like "This house belongs to this many pairs of feet. Bring that many people's worth of gifts, please.") Because of this, Lucas put two of his shoes under the tree, and Lucia did as well. And Cristina said (in the presence of Lucas and Lucia) "We have to put two of their shoes under the tree for Dani and Maria. When we were upstairs we told (prayed? shouted?) the reyes to remember that the gym shoe is for Maria, and the brown tiny shoe is for Dani." I'm not really sure if they prey to these kings or what, since they are biblical figures after all. Not deities. But Lucia already mentioned once how Cristina needed to tell the kings she wanted an iPad when Pixon wasn't around so she'd get it despite him saying it was too expensive.

And Lucia and Lucas had already put the bowl of water outside for the camels (that is what the kings ride on, not reindeer, of course). "Outside is better," said Cristina, "since we don't want those big camels trotting all through the house." "I see," I replied.

And the kids left a plate of cookies and some cups of milk for the kings as well. They can get pretty hungry.

The kids were too excited to go to bed, and of course shared with Cristina that they wanted to stay up late to see the kings. Cristina told them they had to go to sleep, and stay in bed, since she was putting the alarm and if they snuck downstairs, the alarm would go off and the cops would come (PS, did I mention that we had an alarm? We do, and it's only downstairs. So the kids can go to their hall bathroom but if they go down a floor to the kitchen or the basement where I am, it will go off. And yes, the security people call immediately. But the cops don't come. That's just a scare tactic.)

Me being me, I wonder how much of this is really that believable. As a child, I was very critical of the whole magical holiday thing. I analyzed the handwriting from Santa letters so much so that my dad went to the neighbor's house to have them write it instead. Although Lucia is a mere 5 years old, she's very smart. Like Cristina said when she made the Santa videos, Lucia probably would figure out that hers and Lucas' would be very similar in wording. Because of that, Cristina showed Lucas his video a day after, when Lucia wasn't around, so Lucia wouldn't be like "Hey, this looks like mine...could it be pre-recorded?"
So I have found four things that clearly Lucia hasn't caught on to, but I find pretty strange.
1. The alarm system. If she can't come downstairs due to the alarm system, how can three giant kings come inside to leave presents? Do they have their own alarm remote? I guess, though, if they supposedly drive flying camels, they could probably figure something out.
2. If we can communicate to the kings by just sitting in our room and talking aloud much like people pray to God, why do the kids write letters to the kings? Why do they need to visit them, in person, at the mall, to tell them what they want for a gift? Couldn't they save the hassle and just sit in their room and talk to their wall to do it?
3. If the night before Reyes Magos there is a parade in which all three kings show up to give out gifts and candy, but the parade exists in many places at once, who is it that we see in our local parade? Clearly they can't have out-of-body experiences, those kings. Although, again, with the flying camels theory. But I think that the kids would be attuned to the fact that the kings in their local parade look WAY different than the kings in the parades shown on TV, from Madrid or other places in Spain. Or maybe not.
4. In American movies and culture, we often talk about how Santa goes around the world leaving presents in every child's home. Obviously, looking back at that, that was not the case. There are religions that don't celebrate Christmas and therefore households that won't get a Santa visit, but also the people who do celebrate Christmas don't always believe in Santa. I haven't traveled everywhere in the world, but it'd be silly to assume that everywhere in the world that celebrates Christmas celebrates it the same way, with a visit from Santa being the most exciting part. Lucas and Lucia both have heard me say how I don't celebrate Reyes Magos in the USA, and if they haven't, they've clearly seen my confusion with how the holiday is celebrated. Like when I question putting a shoe under a plastic fir tree overnight to yield candy (think about that one for a minute). Even still, Lucia says "The three kings will be visiting all the children in the world tonight..." Clearly that's not the case. Not the case in the USA, at least. I think it's only in Spain. Maybe France too, but I am not sure. So these magical kings will be visiting all the children who live in a country that's the size of Texas? I guess that's a little more plausible than the myth of Santa going around the world. Maybe that leaves this magical tradition a little more sane than ours.

Cookies, also known as head slaps.

When my host family picked me up from the airport on New Year´s Eve, the kids seemed excited to see me, but also shy because my absence made me a stranger to them yet again.

 Lucia happily told me what she got from Santa for Christmas: a Mickey suitcase and a little dolly. Pichón then turned to Lucas and told him to tell me what he got for Christmas. Lucas being Lucas, he refused, and Pichón said “Recibió galletas, dos!” (“He got cookies! Two!” And lightly slapped him on the head twice. I didn´t get it. But then I learned “galletas” means not only “cookies” but also “smacks.” Or, as my dad would say, “head slaps.”

Wait, WHO is calling the cops?!?!

On the night of New Years, while driving back from their grandparents´ house, my host family and I saw some kids sitting/playing on the edge of the highway (but not a busy highway like an interstate or something, it was more like a main road). There were about five kids outside at 7pm, and a couple were sitting on the curb. But we drove by them so quickly, I didn´t really see why they were there or what they were doing.

 Pichón was driving, and upon seeing this group at the last second, he swerved to get farther away from the curb so as not to hit them. Cristina wasn´t paying attention and asked him why he swerved, and he said “There are some stupid kids playing on the curb. I oughta call the police!”

 Apparently Pichón and I were the only ones who saw these kids, because 30 seconds after he said that, Lucia was like “What? Daddy´s calling the police? Why?” And Cristina was like “There are some kids playing outside on the side of the street.”

Then, Delayed-Reaction-Lucas says about three minutes later, “Wait, what did Daddy say about the police?” And Lucia´s like “He´s calling the police” and Lucas is like “Why is Daddy calling the police” And pretty much it was the entire conversation as we drove home, especially since it coincided with Cristina checking her phone for text messages, so the kids thought she was really calling the cops.

 All for some off-hand comment Pichón had made.