Friday, April 20, 2012

"You're so dumb that..."

At work yesterday, Isis pulled out her phone at lunch to show us a new app.

It is an insult app. All you do is type in a person's name, and it spews out an insult at random. It was this weird robotic female voice that would read the person's name, then direct an insult at them.

It was hard for me, language wise, because of two factors: the robot voice and the slang. The voice, and hearing things through a phone's speakers, makes it quite hard for someone who isn't native in the language. (Those phone speakers are the worst. Seriously. We have touch screens but still have fuzzy phone voices? Priorities, people.) The slang made it equally, if not even more, difficult to understand what the insult was. Isis would play one and the whole table would roar in laughter, and I would laugh along because I really had no clue what was being said, but it seemed to be enjoyed by everyone else!

Some were  stupid, like "You are a son of a *****." or just "You're fat."

But then some were pretty clever, but the clever ones were lengthier and required advanced vocab/cultural knowledge.

I was really proud of myself that I understood this joke:

"Eres tan tonta que fumas galletas porque se llaman Maria." 

Translated, it means "You are so dumb that you smoke cookies because they are called 'Maria.'"

See what I mean about cultural clues? You have to understand a couple things to get this joke:
1. Maria cookies are known by their name, like Oreos. They are a graham cracker-like cookie that is so famous that any similar cookie, whether it is of the Maria brand or not, is called a Maria cookie.

2. Maria is slang for marijuana, like Mary-Jane is in English. (Before you worry about how I know this, just know that after walking down Las Ramblas in Barcelona for five minutes you will learn more drug slang than you could ever imagine from the street peddlers.)

So I would like to write this off as an accomplishment, since I understood it, and know how to insult someone in Spain Spanish (Maria cookies are a Spain thing, unfortunately).

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